Friday, September 30, 2011

Homework due

Always check the Homework page tab for updates.
1.      You have an essay due Sunday before midnight. Upload it to turnitin.com at  https://turnitin.com/static/index.php. At that site, find the most recent assignment: Individual vs. Society Final Revised Draft.
2.      Keep reading Pride and Prejudice for a test next Thursday.
3.      Bring the rough draft of your essay to class on Monday to turn in.

Click the Rubric page tab and scroll down to see the rubric being used to mark your essays. Remember to develop an interesting main point. Also, clean up your sentences to make them clear and readable.

Tuesday, September 27, 2011

Students Plan to Revise their Essays

Comments from student blogs about how to revise:
à To revise my essay I need to first off tweak my thesis. Instead of having it lengthy and wordy I'm going to make it more concise. In my thesis I use some weak/passive language.
à My main goal: to make this less of an example essay.

à Sometimes end my quote and then jump right into another one; rather, I need to analyze the first quote thoroughly before continuing on to the second quote.
àI have to always make sure that my sentence is understandable and that the language agrees. 
à I need to find my best points and put them in one place to clarify and develop them!

Monday, September 26, 2011

How to Construct a college essay

Click header: lastname #
How to write a college essay

Your Name
Teacher’s name
Date
Class

Centered title with a catchy phrase, then a colon and a mention of the main point:

Imbalanced Individualism: Liz and Charlotte compromise their ideals

INTRODUCTORY PARAGRAH
Catchy opening:
            Balance is impossible: declaring one’s own individualism against the demands for conformity that society requires will never end in balance. Either the individual will be ostracized as an outside, a black sheep, or he will be assimilated into the conformity of groupthink, buying the same car, wearing the same clothes, talking the same way as the rest of us merely to fit in. 

Avoid wishy washy thesis:
It all depends on the person and what they want, whether they are strong enough to go against the crowd or whether they feel insecure and need the acceptance of fitting in; so it all depends.

Clear thesis with a bold claim:
Individualism will always be in conflict with the conformist demands of society, and oversimplifying the answer to ‘strike a balance’ is dishonest in that it pretends such a compromise exists; whatever they choose, Elizabeth and Charlotte must risk either being an outsider or being co-opted. Neither choice will ever be ideal.

BODY T-E-A PARAGRAPHS with strong claims in topic sentences:
Topic
Evidence
Analysis
NOT:
Many times, individuals will try to go against society and stand up for themselves. Elizabeth is an example of such a person.
[Is this really a hard hitting claim? Does it make you want to read further?]

CONCLUSION?

How to Revise your Essay

Your (new) Paper title ______________________
CHECKLIST FOR A FINAL Revision and Edit
Make big revisions first. Make sure you have one clear, interesting point to make, that it is debatable (not ‘be true to yourself’), that it is clearly and understandably stated, and that it is repeated and developed in the title, thesis, topic sentences, quote analysis, and conclusion.  Avoid the following: example based thesis, list of three elements, confusing thesis sentences,

Proofreading and Editing for Errors
Certain mistakes appear again and again in student papers. Try to learn to spot them and eliminate them before college. Too many mechanical mistakes detract from what you have to say and make readers believe you are careless or not literate. Print your paper out and check through it for the following:
Format
Name, teacher, date, and class in upper left-hand corner. Then a centered, descriptive two-part title with a colon—the title should only fit your essay, not everyone’s: Conformity Essay.  Don’t underline or bold or quote your title, only Austen’s or Krauss’s book. Add a header with your last name, a space, and the automatic pagination.
Common Errors
Comma splice (joining two sentences with a comma), triple spacing between paragraphs (they should be the same spacing), period after the end quotation marks (should go before), missing apostrophe before the s (Hamlets father), misspellings (Austin, loosing), missing header, typing Pride and Prejudice without italics, explaining who Elizabeth is (the daughter of Mr. and Mrs. Bennet), plopping quotes in out of context, etc.
Over-dense Vocabulary and Syntax
Keep sentences and vocabulary clear and understandable. Don’t pack many big words into a short space. Don’t use abstract generalizations. Don’t use passive voice. Keep your prose easy to read and clear to understand. Don’t try to impress by using the thesaurus.
Examples: While many see the benefits of conforming to the social norm as essential for a fruitfully social lifestyle, it is crucial to humans as unique being to strive for individualism because the benefits of idiosyncrasy outweigh those of conformity. Although many people in society embody the traditional values and try to attain an idyllic and conventional world, the progress and development of a society depends on the innovative minds of individual citizens, who have the capability of correlating one’s identity with the stages of individuality. (Revise!)
When quoting material:
Periods and commas go inside the quotation marks.
Question marks, exclamation points, dashes, colons and semicolons are set outside the quotation marks (unless they are part of the source you quote).
When you are using a long quotation, check your system of documentation (MLA at Buckley) for how to define, indent and space long quotations.
Do not place blocked quotations in quotation marks. The indentation indicates that you are quoting.
Make sure you consistently and correctly use the preferred method of citing sources, MLA parenthetical citations and the correct MLA header.

Checking Usage:
Alot is not acceptable as a single word. The proper phrase is "a lot," but that is a rather colloquialized and vague phrase. Be more specific.
Its  is a possessive pronoun. Ex: "Its characteristics are..."
It's is the contraction of it is. Ex: "It's a worthwhile exercise to read this handout."
Their is always plural. Ex: "Their characteristics are..."
There refers to location. (Remember "here and there").
They're is the contraction of they are.
Also check to make sure your nouns and verbs agree in number.
Be careful when using homophones (words that sound alike but mean different things, like accept/except, effect/affect.) If you are ever unsure if you are using the right word, check your dictionary.
Check the paper for colloquial or slang phrases that will take away from the academic tone of your paper. Also be aware of using gender-neutral language, and substitute neutral words for masculine ones (“he or she” for “he”).
Checking Organization:
Make sure you follow your thesis throughout your paper, and that your thesis is clearly stated in your introduction. An unclear or incomplete thesis will be the downfall of any paper.
Check your transitions to make sure that your paragraphs logically flow one to the other.
Check to make sure your paragraphing makes sense. Begin a new paragraph when you begin discussing a new topic, starting with a topic sentence.
Avoid one-sentence paragraphs. Most paragraphs, even transition paragraphs, are at least three sentences long.
Using Present or Past Tense:
Always use present tense when discussing a work of art or literature (called literary present). Ex: "In Huckleberry Finn, Mark Twain employs various local dialects."
Use past tense when discussing events outside the work of art. Ex: "When Mark Twain wrote Huckleberry Finn, America was rapidly industrializing."
Read your paper aloud to check for:
run-on sentences
typographical errors
fragments or incomplete sentences
  Make a list of Errors you particularly have to pay attention to:
_______________________________________

Overly Basic ‘College’ Essays
Intro, body paragraph about how Liz goes against society, body paragraph about how Charlotte or Mrs. Bennet conform to society, Conclusion that repeats that we should avoid conformity, as Austen reminds us to.  Such an essay is passable at the college level, but it is not a strong essay because it is simplistic, lacks an edgy or debatable thesis claim, is overly predictable, and doesn’t contain enough original thought for a top college essay. This is a minimal effort in college writing would be graded thus. (See rubrics)

Thursday, September 15, 2011

Draft and Revise your essay

Tips for writers
(from students ranking the three sample essays with the rubric)
-eliminate wordiness
Fewer words make the sentence communicate more clearly
-avoid redundancy
                Unless you’re emphasizing or clarifying what you said before
-analyze, not summarize
                No plot summary or repeating what happened: explain and analyze
-flow, logical transitions
                Help the reader over your shoulder follow your ideas from point to point
-stick to the main point
                Remove digressions or tie them in with good transition
-Ideas, not just examples
                Don’t fill your essay with only examples; use them to explain your point
-Plan your structure
                Think about how to organize your ideas to make sense
-Correctly punctuate MLA parenthetical citation
                “She will” (Austen 22).  [no comma, no p., period after parenthesis

Wednesday, September 14, 2011

Lit terms to review

Review these Lit terms from the back of our textbook
pages 1484-1487
climax
collquial language
connotation (vs. denotation)
diction
dramatic monologue
end-stopped line
enjambment
epiphany

More Austen pages to study carefully

            CHARLOTTE’S MARRIAGE
85 Charlotte’s engagment

87 Liz confronts Charlotte about marrying Collins

93 Discussing it with Jane

100  Charlotte’s wedding

            WICKHAM AND MISS KING
98-9 Mrs. Gardiner warns Liz about Wickham

103, 105 Liz’s reactions to Miss King and Wickham

            ROSINGS with Darcy and Charlotte
109 Collins

113 Lady Catherine: Liz talks back

119 Darcy and Liz sparring

125-6 Col. Fitzwilliam: second sons can’t marry poor

            DARCY’S PROPOSAL and the AFTERMATH
129-31 Darcy’s self-centered proposal: “inferiority” “degradation”

134 Darcy’s letter of explanation: ‘three young sisters, occasionally even your father’
  Jane’s “indifference”;  Wickham eloped with Georgiana (15) for her fortune

139 Liz re-reading (and re-evaluating) Darcy’s letter

141 Till this moment I never knew myself
   Liz’s epiphany: she sees her own blind spot: ‘prided myself on discernment’

144 Bad Dad ‘would never exert himself to restrain the giddiness of the daughters’

148 uglier hats --Lydia

152 Liz’s confession ‘I meant to be uncommonly clever’ taking a dislike to Darcy

            LYDIA TO BRIGHTON?
155 lamentations resounding (sounds, hyperbole, satire on the regiment leaving Meryton

156 Dad’s big mistake: he says no to Liz (sarcastically), yes to Lydia ‘expose herself’

159-60 Liz sees her parents’ marriage problems: Bad Dad

            AT PEMBERLEY
163 Pemberley: Mrs Reynolds praises Darcy

168 Darcy appears! How embarrassing!

174 Georgiana Darcy

180-1 Caroline Bingley gossips about Liz: ‘great loss for your family’; ‘self-sufficiency which is intolerable’

            BENNET FAMILY CRISIS ABOUT LYDIA
182 Jane’s letter is a crisis; ‘my father bears it better’; W. never intended to marry Lydia;

185 How Darcy reacts to Liz’s crisis: ‘Good God, what is the matter!’

189 Bad Dad

192 Wedding Clothes? At a time like this?

197 What does it mean to “ruin”?

199 Collin’s ‘reassurances’ are really gloating

200 Dad blames himself (for a moment)

208 Do they ever refer to sex?

            LYDIA TIES THE KNOT
212 Lydia brags about getting married

214 Lydia reveals the secret of who was at her wedding (can you guess?)

216 Bad Dad

220 Liz tortures Wickham